Fresh, Hot Wastes of Time

Tonight’s meal:

Pan fried chicken
Mashed skin-on potatoes
Cream gravy
Buttermilk biscuits
Strawberry shortcake

all homemade. Scuse me, gotta pop now.

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Yesterday I checked airfares and there was a $600 first class fare to Las Vegas. I held off on booking it because I didn’t understand it, and now it’s gone. I guess I didn’t realize that airlines can have a fare available for one day only. What are the odds I’ll find that fare again?

Slim to none.

I’m absolutely furious that I missed out on that deal. Now the lowest I can find is $850. I’ve been cursing a blue streak for the last few hours, and trying to find any remnant of the good fare left over on any of the online booking engines. No such luck.

Damn, but I am seriously hacked off. I hate missing a good bargain.

Recently it has become my holy grail to find an authentic Hermes Birkin or Kelly bag at a thrift store for $25. Seeing as how these bags sell for over $5000 even used, and the new ones have an 18-36 month waiting list, I think it would be an ultimate find.

I’ve asked hub for a replica Murakami designed Louis Vuitton bag for my birthday. The real ones are impossible to lay hands on and cost well into the four digits.

The thought of paying that much for a hunk of leather and some metal fills me with revulsion. When I was in junior high school it was the ‘in’ thing to have a Louis Vuitton monogram Speedy handbag. The Alma style was also acceptable. My mother understandably balked at shelling out $400+ for a handbag for a kid, but she did buy me the $40 knockoff at the store around the corner. You could tell it was fake because the “LV” monogram was right side up on both sides, and on the real ones it’s upside down on one side.

Now, however, the $465 for the Speedy 30 doesn’t seem like such a bad deal. I’ve been carrying my grandmother’s Dooney & Burke for 5 years or so and it’s held up spotlessly. Although it’s sheer insanity to pay $14,000 for a purse, there is something to be said about a well-made bag, and the famous designers generally make a better bag than most.

Wanna see some cute kids?

Jo and Caroline.

Let me preface this by saying that every single time we have plans to do something as a family, one or both of the children refuses to sleep the night before. Last night the baby didn’t get to sleep until 2, and she was up before 9.

Today we went to the lake. We packed up the kids and bathing suits and cooler and towels and snacks and headed out to Lake LBJ, where my brother and I are building a house. The baby screamed (bloodcurdlingly, at a volume setting of 11) all the way there.

I hadn’t seen the lakehouse since before they even staked out the foundation, and now it’s all framed up and they’re finishing putting on the raw roof. I don’t know what the technical term for the stage of completion is, but it was amazing to walk through the house and see in real life what I’d only seen on a piece of papar. I’m not the kind of girl who easily visualizes spatial references, so I just couldn’t picture what it was going to look like. I know now, and I can can sum it up in one word:

Huge.

Then I took the girls back to the car and started changing everyone’s clothes because like dunderheads we didn’t wear bathing suits on the way out there. The back doors of the Suburban swung shut on us. There I was trapped with 2 hot kids in the back of the car and no door handle to let us out easily. And I was naked from the waist down. Once I got some clothes on, I hauled my fat ass over the back seat with its accompanying kid carseats and let some fresh air into the car. Both girls had gotten prickly heat by this time.

We have a little beach area on our lot that the kids went wading in. The baby got her toes wet and started shivering. She’s like her mama – water’s only good when it’s 78 degrees or warmer. The 3 yo had to be dragged out of the water kicking and screaming. I think we know which one the water baby is.

We collected all the gear and loaded up the boat and got the life jackets on the kids which precipitated another round of screaming by the baby, who didn’t like her jacket. I could kind of understand that because it was the really uncomfortable kind of jacket that we had to wear on the cruise ship during the drill and I almost started hollering then, too.

So there we were in the boat, toting around a child who for all the world sounded like we were pulling out her toenails with pliers. People on the shore and other boats looked like they were about to call the cops on us. 2 minutes into our much-anticipated boat ride, we were pulling back in. The preparation took 3 times as long as the actual trip.

I think next time we’ll just have to get special toddler life vests. I even think they’ll enjoy boat rides. I’d expected the older one to freak out once we started moving, but she just grinned. She only told hub to slow down once. This is good news for our plans to buy a boat of our own.

I was pretty meh about the whole lakehouse thing, but now I’m really excited. I can’t wait for it to be finished. I have a feeling that we’ll start camping out in it as soon as they run water. Who needs carpet and paint?

Now they’re back in business again.

“Hello, I’m here to have an argument.”
“No, you’re not.”

They’re going out of business again. What. A shock.

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