I married Superman

February 11, 2009 - 8:23 pm Comments Off on I married Superman

557070_alcoholic_dream_The other day my husband called me. He was picking up lunch – some hot dogs from one of Austin’s ubiquitous trailer food stands.

“Lunch is going to be a little late,” he said. “I had to subdue a drunk and take away his keys. Just waiting for the police to get here.”

Apparently when he got to the counter, there was a guy just standing there, not saying anything. Everyone waited. Finally the cashier asked, “Hey buddy, can I get you anything?”

The drunk guy replied, “… Todd.”

At this point everyone knew something was wrong, and the guy started to wander to his car. He got in, proceeded to back up, and was backing towards the proprietor’s auto. Folks just watched him do it. Hub dashed over, reached in, grabbed the keys and made off with them. He said Drunk Guy got out and took a couple of bleary swings at him, but Hub led him over to one of the tables and sat him down, keeping him busy with conversation until the police could get there. Drunk Guy acquiesced easily enough, talking about his business, wife and family.

Eventually the cops came, took Hub’s statement, and the food establishment comped him one lousy order of fries. He came home with our hot dogs, none the worse for wear, thank God.

I wonder why that man was so plastered on a Monday noon.

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