Fresh, Hot Wastes of Time

Well, I wasn’t satiated with the 5 rings I already belonged to and went hunting for more, which brought me to the realization that there aren’t any webrings for Austin bloggers. Seeing as how this town is insanely cutting edge, I felt there were hundreds if not thousands out there, dying to be represented in such a way. *cough*

Anyway, I started the Austin Bloggers web ring. You don’t have to live in Austin to join it. You can join it if you’d like to live in Austin, or used to live here and don’t anymore, or if it’s a day that ends in ‘Y’.

Good heavens, I’m terribly sorry – nature’s way of telling you to open the window
Poor Ronald McDonald seems to have met up with a necktie party

Weird Japanese commercials featuring people you know
Got a half-baked idea? Submit it here and let other people pick it to pieces
Famous people loops – which famous people have what in common?

I sent my old keyboard to rehab to dry out and am using this nasty Apple keyboard in the interim. The keys are really mushy and I don’t feel like I’m typing as fast as I normally do, so I shall blame that if I seem slow today. It’s also smaller than real keyboards so I shall blame that if I seem small-minded.

There are those new commercials featuring the revolutionary extra strength super happy fun power anti-perspirant stripe. What I’m wondering is, why don’t they make the entire stick out of the extra-strength stripe? I guess it’s a similar pondering to “if the stuff that black boxes on airplanes is made of is indestructable, why not make the entire plane out of it?”

I find an obscure, perverse, yet satisfying pleasure in tearing open perforated plastic. You know what I mean, like on paper towel packages, or toilet paper packages, or diaper packages. You know what else I like? The single serving little paper salt and pepper packs that snap open. And I like the faint smell of skunk.

Post your guilty pleasures in the comments section.

Order your brochure now detailing the joys of nude recreation
This is the teeniest porn I have ever seen. Not that I’ve seen a lot of porn, of course.
I found the link on RuPaul’s blog. It’s… interesting.

I don’t know how many updates there will be today as a damncat seems to have spilled a glass of water into my keyboard and now the keyboard is acting totally haywire. You have no idea how long it took just to get this entry coherent.

Swearing keyboard

Gnight.

Woman goes off her meds, thinks she was married to the Berlin Wall.
Isn’t this ironic – US soldier who was wounded at Kandahar has jaw wired shut, airline refuses to let him bring along wire clippers (to be used in case he chokes or vomits).
This is interesting… David Still allows you to be him.
No, this isn’t for science class, although it looks like it should be. They’re for Biblical object lessons. Mmm hmm.

I had a nice day. My friend came over with her daughter and the kids played and played. We ordered in dinner and I made dessert. Hut fudge pudding cake, oh lordy if there’s a heaven I was there tonight. E-mail me if you want the recipe.

Remember when you were a kid and the guy/girl you were dating made you a mix tape? Wasn’t that just the coolest? I used to spend house analyzing songs – whether he chose it because he likes me or because it’s just a cool song, etc. There’s a tape a guy made for me when I was in college that was awesome, only now I can’t find it and I have no idea where it might have ended up. I also had a platonic friend make me a mix tape but he liked it so much he kept it and played it for me when I came to visit. Do kids even do mix tapes anymore?

Analog is so retro.

Disturbing search requests for today:

panty inspection video – I’m number 1 on this list. Neat.
men in girdles – the newest sexual craze?
weird scuba things – I don’t think I want to know more about it.

Get to know your fellow bloggers with Blogger Insider.

Heavens to Betsy, I had 75 visits yesterday, and 100 page views. You like me! You really like me! I probably won’t update much tomorrow since a friend’s coming over for a playdate, so I’m getting it all out of my system today. And how. This is what, 8 posts in 24 hours?

Here’s a terrible joke:

Cinderella desperately wanted to go to the grand ball at the castle. She asked her fairy godmother, “However shall I go to the ball wearing rags and on shank’s mare?”

Her fairy godmother told her “Never fear, I know just the thing!” and poof, she waved her magic wand and Cinderella had a stunning ballgown on. She waved her magic wand again and poof, there was a fine coach and 6 white horses to pull it.

Fairy Godmother said to Cinderella, “Now dear, you must make sure to get back home before midnight, because if you don’t, you will turn into a pumpkin!”, and Cinderella nodded in acquiescence.

At the ball, Cinderella was by far the most beautiful maiden there and the Prince was quite taken with her, dancing every dance with her. Suddenly Cinderella exclaimed, “Oh, no! What time is it?” as she had quite lost track.

“Ten till midnight,” said the Prince.

“I have to go! I have to leave!” said Cinderella, near tears.

“But wait – I didn’t even catch your name,” replied the Prince.

“My name’s Cinderella, what’s yours?” asked Cinderella.

“Peter Peter Pumpkin Eater,” said the Prince.

“Oh, I think I can stay a little bit longer.”